Monday, February 28, 2011

Memories

I love making memories with my children.  I'm very intentional about it.  I spend a lot of time and energy planning and preparing for moments that I hope they will remember and cherish.  When they are grown, I would love to know that they are who they are and value what they value IN PART because of the moments we had together as a family.

I know that's true for me.

I am who I am IN PART because of the moments I shared with my family growing up.

My brother and I recently had a conversation with our mom regarding our childhood memories.  She wanted to know if we had any "good" memories of times when we were together as a family.

Hmmm.

Here's the deal... I have LOTS of good memories with my family.  Lots.  But they are hinged upon choices we made in that moment to enjoy each other and what we had in the midst of the pain we were experiencing.  Every time.

My brother made a statement during that conversation that really struck me:  "The only people who dwell on bad times are people who have no sense of goodness or mercy in their lives."


I thought that was worth posting.  


I always want to be aware of God's goodness and mercy in my life.   


My memories are only a PART of me. 


I am made WHOLE because of who He is and has always been in me.


And I am thankful that He will complete and make WHOLE each of the lives of my children.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Just keepin' it real...

I'm struggling a bit.

I hesitate to post about this because I'm not sure what you (whoever "you" are) will think of me.  I know I could journal it and keep it private; but I'm going to keep things real and put it out there.

Some days it's really hard to be a 41 year old mother of a toddler.

And I know it's incredibly selfish for me to feel this way.

He's amazing.  He's adorable.  He's a gift to me.  And I'm crying as I write this.  The Lord spoke so clearly to me when we found out we were unexpectedly expecting another child and I was thrown by the news... "This is a GIFT from Me to you."

And he is.

But it's hard to find myself back in the very limiting toddler phase of life when most of my peers are experiencing the freedom that comes with older children.  Lunches during the school day with friends (at a grown-up restaurant).  Afternoon movies.  Weekend getaways with husbands.  Date nights.  Date DAYS.  All of these remain fairly out of my reach.

Homeschooling doesn't help the situation.

Generally, I'm okay with it.  I find that if I stay in a place of gratitude my perspective more closely resembles His perspective.  And I really do have so much to be grateful for.

But there are days...

And today is one of those days.

So, I'll have another cup of coffee.

And one or two Dove dark chocolate eggs.

Or three.

And go play with my baby.

I know he won't be a baby all that long.

I've got three big kids to prove it.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Blog Blahs

I have the blog blahs.  I don't have the time I'd love to really be creative and write beautifully.  I don't know how to make this blog look the way I'd like it to look.  I occasionally sit down at computer and check out other bloggers out there and feel even more frustrated.

Where in the blankity-blank do these women come up with the time to post so often?

Maybe if I'd finally cave and hire someone to clean my house I could use that time to blog.

Nah.  There'd be something else pressing to do.

Plus, I firmly believe that when my hiney (sp?) touches my desk chair and my fingers touch my keyboard, some kind of gravitational pull draws my toddler to my side.  Every.  Single.  Time.

Another thing.  Since I had my precious fourth child, my brain has turned to mush.

I'm serious.

Mush.

I'm trying to nurture it back to life.

It's not going well.

And another thing.  Facebook is so much EASIER!  It's so quick and I just have to come up with one good thought at a time.

Facebook is evil and must be stopped.

Who am I kidding?  I love Facebook.  I adore Facebook.  I'm definitely addicted to Facebook.

I might have to address that one of these days...

But for now I'll leave you with this...


Have a happy Tuesday.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Snowmageddon

Snowmageddon, SnOklahoma, Snowpacalypse...

If you've been on Facebook at all in the last nine days, those words will be very familiar to you.

Tulsa has been hit with the heaviest snowfall in its history in the last week and a half.  It's been CRAZY.

Speaking of crazy... I'm heading there.

The boys have been home from school now for SEVEN days.  Mark has been working from home for five of the last seven work days.

No schedule.  No routine.  No sanity.

I've seen so many posts about how much others have enjoyed this down time.  DOWN TIME?!!  Not in this house.

Toddlers and snowstorms simply DO NOT mix.

Still, being snowbound has made me mindful of all there is to be thankful for in my life.  The last time we were inundated with winter weather, it was in the form of heavy ice and power outages and accompanied by the death of my father.

This winter storm, though at times stressful and inconvenient, is full of life.  LOTS of life.



For that, I am thankful.